Monday, April 30, 2007

E-mails Show Cheney Inquired With DC Madam

Washington, DC—E-mails from Vice President Dick Cheney to Deborah Jeane Palfrey, otherwise known as the “DC Madam,” reveal that the Vice President repeatedly contacted Palfrey in December 2004 to inquire about her firm’s services. Palfrey stands accused of running a prostitution operation whose clients may include some of Washington’s elite figures. Indeed, last Friday Deputy Secretary of State Randall L. Tobias resigned his post after it was revealed he was once a client of Palfrey’s.

In surprisingly forward exchanges released by Palfrey to select media outlets, the Vice President reached out to Pamela Martin and Associates, Palfrey’s firm, in search of “no-strings” female companionship as a way to “ring in four more years of tough love—old style.” The revelations threaten to rock Washington and the Bush White House at a time when the entire political establishment is wondering who might be among Palfrey’s customers.

Although none of the e-mails released by Palfrey confirm Cheney actually met with a woman in Palfrey’s employ, the messages clearly illustrate an eagerness on the Vice President’s part for such an arrangement. Several messages obtained by Spank Media are posted here.

E-mail Messages From December 3, 2004

1. Cheney to Palfrey
Subject: Rock out with your Cock out
Hey good lookin’! Whatcha got cookin’? In need for some action over here. How does this work?

2. Palfrey to Cheney
Subject: Re: Rock out with your Cock out
How did you get this e-mail address?

3. Cheney: Are you stressin’ already?

4. Palfrey: Standard procedure. Please tell me how you got this e-mail address.

5. Cheney: Relax, sweet lips. Hot Karl said you can help us celebrate the reelection…How many can you send?

6. Palfrey: I’m not sure what you’re asking for. Did you mean to contact Pamela Martin and Associates?

7. Cheney: Gee Babe, play hard to get much? I told you how I got your information, so can we get this thing moving? The boys over here want to bust one.

8. Palfrey: This is not how we normally do business.

9. Cheney: Can we get two? Do they do it to each other? In case my wife finds out I can say it’s for her too.

10. Palfrey: Please talk to your friend about how our services are normally procured. Goodbye.

11. Cheney: Don’t be like that! Hey, how can I make this right with you, sugar lips?

12. Cheney: You there?

13. Cheney: Anyone home? Did I mention the case of Cristal?

14. Cheney: Ah, shucks. I guess not then.

15. Cheney: This isn’t fair. I can’t do it like Hot Karl does it! Can’t you make special arrangements?

16. Cheney: I’m so lonely over here. Scooter is interested too—he says you know him. Wish I had a sweet thing or two. Or three. Two for themselves and one for me. Do you discount for big orders? In Wyoming the Wal-Marts give you deals when you buy more than one. Not women. Usually just shotguns or feed bags for the livestock. But you know what I mean. Jeez I’m really rambling here...

17. Cheney: If you think giving me the silent treatment is going to work you’ve got another thing coming. I eat little piss ants like you for breakfast. I don’t know if you watch the news but I have a reputation for not giving a crap what people think. I tell the president what to do. Do you read me?

18. Cheney: One hot little party. Christ. Is this so much to ask? You put them in a car THAT I SEND TO YOU FOR FREE and that’s it. We’ll pay double. They can order from the chef downstairs. Whatever they like, Jesus it’s freaking Willy Wonka’s Wonderpalace around here and you can’t even pick four or five lucky lassies? This is bullshit.

19. Cheney: I swear if this is about the pacemaker, it won’t even be a problem. If I go down in the saddle Secret Service just shoves them out the door. Poof. It never happened. Damn it, I should have mentioned that right off the bat. Does that impress you?

20. Cheney: You’ll be sorry for making a mockery of me. One hand job in 4 godforsaken years! She gives me one little bit of nothing in 4 years—oh but don’t bother her when she’s writing one of her girls’-night-out stories, you just get kicked to the curb and then find yourself demonized by that peckerneck jon stewart and freaking Wolf Piss Ant Number One Blitzer is asking you to talk about your daughter and her lesbian baby, this is such crap I am out of here I don’t even need you or your worthless tramps!!